True friendship is like sound health,
the value of it is seldom known until it be lost.
Charles Caleb Colton
Over the past couple of weeks, I have developed a deeper appreciation of those who I consider my friends. I think that there are people that flit in and out of our lives, sometimes being friends, sometimes being acquaintance. And then there are those who become true friends.
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My dearest friend is my husband. Last weekend, we celebrated our 29th wedding anniversary. We have known each other 35 years. He is funny and sweet. He is wonderful husband (he does do almost all of the grocery shopping, flips the mattress on a schedule that he has written out (he is a little OCD) and usually ends up finishing doing the laundry . . . I do the folding . . . he does most of the washing). He is a great father, tempering my vast array of emotions with a sense of humor and patience. He recognizes that Lindsey knows exactly what buttons to push and sometimes he lets her but he is much more gentle in calling her out when she is pushing too hard. He is a good teacher and enjoys working with the first graders. It is such a pleasure to see him when he is discussing their accomplishments . . . he calls them the "Light Bulb" moments. His butt is cute. He also wears the same size jeans he did when we got married . . . for that, however, I could sometimes smack him.
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My next dearest friend is Janet. Janet started working with me shortly before my wedding. We have had sooooo many ups and downs together. She has held my hand while I cried about not being able to have children. She laughed with me when we found out that Sarah would be joining our family, and supported Dave and I when we took in my niece's children. She has embraced my children as her grandchildren. When her husband was diagnosed with Alzheimer's, we cried together. When each of our parents died, we were there for each other. She even went to confession before my Mom's funeral so she could receive communion. She has taken my kids on various trips and vacations, mostly Lindsey. She is the person that I can recruit to plant a seed in the kids' heads. The things mothers do. She just celebrated her 70th and she and Lindsey are planning Lindsey's college graduation trip (in six years) to Ireland . . . they have decided that they would allow me to accompany them.
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Then there is Wendy. Wendy is my neighbor. She moved two doors down from me, shortly before her eldest son was born and he is 18. I have to tell you that we are such good friends, we are each other's support person for the TOGa study. Which means, GASP, is that we know exactly how much each other weighs. We have done stamping and scrapbooking and girls' nights together. We were one of the first Friday Nite Girls with Radio Delilah and, I believe, if you click
here, and go to picture 87 (out of 110) you can see our picture. I am the one in red. Wendy is sitting straight across from me and the one standing is Laura, who I talk about below.
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Laura is my buddy/friend/pal. We had worked together for years but had never worked "together" until about 11 years ago. We were both working for the same woman who is the queen of psycho babble, also fondly known as "DP." DP is only happy when she is the queen bee. She is a horrible people manager, pits her underlings (and, yes, that is how she thinks of us) against each other. You have no idea how totally pissed off she got (and still is) that Laura and I became friends inspite of her conspiracies. Think of the worst manager you have ever known and she is worse. She gives instructions and contradicts them. It was so bad that at one point, every time she would "assign" me a task, I would send an email back to her to confirm exactly what she wanted done. I am sure she thought I was a dunce but on more than one occasion, those little email confirmations saved my butt. It was so effective, that Laura, who still works for DP still does the same thing. Frankly, it plays to DP's ego and I don't think she has ever figured out the purpose. DUH.
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Anyway, Laura's oldest child is the same age as Lindsey (15) and our youngest boys are also the same age (8). We have decided that while we thought the worst was the terrible toys, that age in no way prepared us for the frankly fearsome fifteen. She works part-time in my office. We generally each lunch together once or twice a week. Last week, she said to me, "you are the only person I know that I can say this to. I don't like my 15 year old. He goes from being sweet to surly to kind to wacky." Funny thing is my 15 year old does the same thing and when my oldest daughter was 15, she wasn't very nice to be around either. LOL. I keep promising her that it will pass.
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I have other friends who I treasure. Some of the teachers that my husband works with. I have discovered that teachers are very social creatures. Or at least the teachers he hangs out with are. We regularly get together for dinner or appetizers or fun.
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I have friends from Church. Those who I know I will always be able to rely on . . . including calling them up to go fetch one or other of the kids because I'm stuck in traffic. How many people would you trust that task to?
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I have my internet friends, my knitting buddies, the ones who will painstakingly explain over and over again how to do a stitch or pattern or who thoroughly understand my lack of sock and sweater knitting.
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I have my sisters and brother and their spouses. I was talking to my brother and sister-in-law last evening and when I got off the phone, I kept thinking about how much I not only love them, but how much I like them. They are good people. Kind, loyal, generous and funny. I guess that is probably what I like most about my friends. It is that same, certain thread that runs through all of them . . . the kindness they show others, loyalty to what they believe, generous sometimes to a fault and funny.
